The Proper Place

There is a wonderful old Hans Christian Andersen story about a magic flute that produced a special tone with an accompanying wind that blew everything back to its proper place. 

That was a very dangerous flute but it burst after the first note was sounded – and I think that was very fortunate for all concerned. 

This old fairy tale has come to mind recently, for some reason, as the fourth anniversary of the death of my wife Magucha arrives – 21^st January. I certainly don’t want to make of this day anything other than another day. But it’s a very special day for me as it was 4 years ago that our relationship irretrievably ended, as all things must end. A relationship that was, looking back, I believe very special in many ways. 

I was very fortunate to have had her as a “mate” in every sense of that word. She would, I believe, have stood by me to “man the battlements” had she been called on to do so. And I can’t think of anything I would not have done for her. I am aware that distance lends enchantment – and she is now four years distant from me – but I still believe that. 

As I mentioned the old fairy tale about the flute that sent everything back to its “proper place” has come to mind. I like to imagine that forty-two years ago, when we first met, we each subconsciously heard the echo of that first note of the magic flute and were blown together by the accompanying wind. That we were now in our proper place. 

Then the end came, the inevitable end that bookends all life. We are born and we will die. 

But then maybe, just maybe, that too is our “proper place”?

I’m going to quote the poet Shelley, from his poem “Adonais” – an elegy written about Keats, after he heard of Keats’ death. I will quote some of this poem, admittedly out of context, remembering that it was written about a man, because I like the sentiments expressed – what follows is from parts of stanzas 38 (XXXVIII), 39 (XXXIX) and 53 (LIII):

“ ….. but the pure spirit shall flow

Back to the burning fountain whence it came,

A portion of the Eternal, which must glow

Through time and change, unquenchably the same, ….”

Also:-

“Peace, peace! he is not dead, he doth not sleep –

He hath awakened from the dream of life –”

Also:-

“Why linger, why turn back, why shrink, my Heart?

Thy hopes are gone before: from all things here

They have departed; thou shouldst now depart!”

Does all this mean that this life is but a small part of the “real Life” and that that place, wherever it is, is the “Proper place”?

It pleases me to think so, that she is now in her “Proper place” – that Magucha has now “awakened from the dream of life”. That she is out of sight and has gone on ahead of me. But that one day I too will be in my "proper place" with her. 

Maybe!!!