E+V+V+M=L

Ethics + Virtues + Values + Morals = Life (and well-being). Why? 

Amended 8 January 2020: 

I know I wrote this many years ago now (maybe I was in a more serious mood!) - but it still holds true - particularly in world at present! 

At least in my mind it does.

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There seems to be some confusion about the terms Ethics, Values, Virtues and Morals. Certainly the terms Ethics and Morals are used indiscriminately and are considered interchangeable as are Virtues and Values. Yet they each have a name and therefore a purpose. 

It is here stated that virtues are at the core of both morality and ethics. Virtues are the qualities people admire and aspire to and define a ‘good person’; the qualities of kindness, compassion, courage, honesty, temperance, humility, integrity and justice. A person cannot be either ethical or moral without also being virtuous. Anyone’s ethical and moral qualities together with their virtue are dependent on their set of values; their beliefs, something that is at the core of their being. Values are not just mannerisms or a set of preferences. They refer to something much deeper and more subtle, to a line that cannot be transgressed. It has been suggested (possibly unkindly) that human beings as a species are neither intelligent nor creative enough to have invented morality, virtues, ethics or values; that these are innate and part of the human psyche.

In a general discussion, however, it is sometimes best to consider each term separately, even though they are interwoven and have a symbiotic relationship. They work together because to be at ease with yourself and to create and  maintain a meaningful balance between the conflicting demands of work (to earn a living); family (love and building and maintaining relationships); time out for one’s self (R and R and to reflect on and assimilate the varied influences that affect your quality of life) they cannot be isolated and used or applied piecemeal. 

Ethics, morals, virtues and values should be considered as facets of the same jewel – a human being who has fulfilled their potential. Each supports the other and somehow the whole is greater than the sum of the individual parts – like the facets cut on a precious stone.

Similarly they cannot be considered as disposable items, to be used and then discarded. Nor are they to be written up only to be kept in a drawer and dusted off when a crisis looms. They need to come from the heart. They need to be practiced daily, to become a habit of excellence. In effect they are the essence of Humanity and what it is to be a good person. And we all want to be considered good – in fact to accuse someone of not being ‘good’ is an affront and taken as an insult. 

So then:

Ethics: the principled treatment of other so as to cause no harm – “treat others as you would like to be treated”. 

Morals: the reasoned ability to distinguish between right and wrong, or positive and negative in relation to the actions, volitions, or character of responsible beings.  

Virtues: the qualities which determine the Moral excellence of a person.

Values: the beliefs which set parameters or limits to a person’s thinking, and which are evidenced only by their actions.

Someone who is ethical has sound values, supported by appropriate virtues and moral precepts - in other words the basis for a good, socially integrated, Life. 

A special day.

Today – the last day of August – is always a special day for me. It is the anniversary of our wedding. Magucha and I. That was in 1979 – so today would have been our fortieth. 

Not long, I suppose, in the great scheme of things but long enough for there to be many memories. Fond memories. Memories of deep friendship; memories of close companionship; memories of quiet evenings together when each knew that they were loved. That is the important part.  The love.

I try not to dwell on the end – I mean death does come to us all. The “uninvited visitor” calls at His own time and place. I like to dwell, rather, on the strength we each seemed to give to the other and on the many important, if seemingly relatively minor, events that shaped our life together.

But above all I recall Magucha’s strength of character and her courage. She was utterly fearless and met all that Life (and the Fates) threw at her with a courage and fortitude that I found inspiring. 

She never complained. Each day, every event was a new adventure and I never once, not ever, heard her ask “Why me?” Her slowly declining health was certainly a sore trial for all concerned but she always met each day with a smile of good cheer and always with plans afoot. She seemed always to shine a kindly light, which was appreciated by all and drew many into her orbit.

I know that Magucha has gone on ahead, that she is out of sight. But, to me, she is still there and I know, just know, that one-day we will reach out and hold hands again.

I am certainly not the only one who holds such beliefs – many over the millennia have said the same. So I don’t think I am all that wrong!

As anyone who reads what I write will know, I have always loved poetry.  Now the poet who writes under the pseudonym  of Atticus seems to capture my mood very well, and with some humour:

“Angels must be warm to fly –

That’s why she always 

Slept in socks.”

And it is true Magucha always (well nearly always) started off with very loose socks, inevitably discarded during the night!

But this poem, by the Bengali poet Rabindranath Tagore, just titled 87, from a little booklet called Gitanjali always affects me:

“In desperate hope I go and search for her in all the corners of my room; 

I find her not.

My house is small and what once has gone from it can never be regained.

But infinite is thy mansion, my Lord, and seeking her I have come to thy door.

I stand under the golden canopy of thine evening sky and I lift my eager eyes to thy face.

I have come to the brink of eternity from which nothing can vanish – no hope, no happiness, no vision of a face seen through tears.
Oh, dip my emptied life into that ocean, plunge it into the deepest fullness. Let me for once feel that lost sweet touch in the allness of the universe."

America

Below is copied, from a book of Max Ehrmann’s poems, a piece called “America” that I believe should resonate with the many wonderful people in the USA. But remember that this was written early last century – I believe sometime before 1910. But what has changed?

America

Lincoln, rise up from out thy tomb today,

Thou lover of the lives of common men,

America has work for thee again.

Here women want in sight of wealth’s display,

Man grinds his brother down and holds sway

As in the times of bloody lash and den,

Save now the flesh is white, not black as then.

In toiling holes young girls grow old, decay.

Though thou art dead, could but thy soul return

In one who loved his fellow-men as thou;

Instead of greed that we might justice learn,

Love character in place of gold as now,

Write far across our native land’s sweet soil,

“Here none shall live upon another’s toil!”