Facing one’s mortality.

Please don’t think that I am ill – terminal or otherwise! I would hate to shock my one loyal reader. No. I am speaking more generally about mortality. In my case I know that I am much closer to the end than the beginning of my life so I suppose that sub-consciously I have mellowed and adopted a more philosophical approach to Life and the various travails encountered on my journey along Life’s road.

What actually suggested this post is a change in attitude noticed in a person known to me. Others too have noticed a substantial mellowing in attitude toward relationships – at least in the work-place – now taken by this person. It is surmised that this mellowing and gentler approach results from being diagnosed with a severe illness and the associated suffering which always accompanies such an illness. It is cancer, which is (assumed) to be of a serious type, that unless treated early is always terminal.

Now, because this person is always reticent and seemingly unable to form appropriate work place relationships – normally seeing the inevitable work place problems in strict black or white terms – no one is certain about the actual illness, except to note the obvious, that this person is ill. Unfortunately no one has ever wanted to be close enough to either ask or to be told what the matter is. This is a rather sad situation don’t you think? Not to be close enough to the people you work with to be able to share your joys or your troubles.

Everyone has their problems and everyone has their joys and one of the comforts of being human is to share these with others. It helps to realise that others have had similar experiences – that one is not alone. Being human means we are all members of Humanity; we are all of one blood; we all share the same range and intensity of emotions; we all accept, to differing degrees, the challengers presented to us on our life’s journey. With help from others – or providing help to others – the challengers met and the burdens we all carry are somehow lightened, because they are now shared.

This should be one of the great comforts of life; to know that whatever happens there will be a welcoming smile and a friendly shoulder to lean on. Better still - show a welcoming smile and offer a friendly shoulder to others. I just hope that the person I have been talking about may now have realised these truths about living. That by helping others one is, in turn, helped. My hope is that whatever the outcome of the illness this person will attain peace of mind.

I cannot imagine anything worse than to leave this life knowing that some people are glad to know that you are no longer a burden to them; that your negativity will no longer blight their lives; that there will be some who are actually glad you are no longer alive. This would be a very sad end to anyone’s life. Everyone likes to believe that they are a worthy human being and that others think the same.

Remember that a person’s worth is not how much they have, or what they have made or done but who they are!

Who are you?

Sell your reputation for a song

People have idols; things they value above all others; even, unfortunately more than they value themselves – their self-worth, their honour and their reputation. There has been a spate of media reports about people who have indulged in, shall we say, less than charitable behaviour – I refer particularly to Mark Standen, the former deputy director of the New South Wales Crime Commission who has been convicted of drugs charges and perverting the course of justice. But there are others – lawyers, doctors and civil servants who have been found guilty of malpractice of one type or another.

I have said before that poets can often say in a few words what it takes others, like me, many words to express. There is a very appropriate verse in the Rubaiyat of Omar Khayyam (an 11th Century Persian mathematician, astronomer and poet) - which goes as follows (verse 69):


Indeed the Idols I have loved so long
Have done my Credit in Men’s Eyes much wrong:
Have drown’d my Honour in a shallow cup,
And sold my Reputation for a Song.

For many people their idols are money (or the “stuff’ that money can buy); or prestige and the power that comes with the position. If you “love” something above all others – an idol - this will soon be apparent to all who know you. You will have removed yourself from the rest of humanity; you will be using people as a means to an end; you will be using people to acquire more of what you “love”. They will sense this and you will have done your “credit in Men’s eyes much wrong”.

To get your idol you will cheat, you will lie, you will become untrustworthy, you will be immoral, you will not be ethical in your activities. You will have drowned your honour in a shallow cup – lost your honour for something of little value – a “shallow cup”.

Your love for, your fixation to, your worship of your idol means that you have lost all sense of proportion or reason and are prepared to sell your self-worth – who you are – for something of no substance, a “song”. You will have diminished yourself as a human being.

No one will ever trust you again – your self-worth, your reputation, your honour will have been damaged almost beyond repair.