It's a world of partings

It’s a very true saying – that this is “a world of partings”. There is no need to get maudlin about it. It just is what it is. Friends parting; young family members going their separate ways in the world; divorce; then the most confronting parting of all – death.

 

Nothing anyone can do about it. But, as I have written before, no one knows or has the least understanding of the “meaning” of Life (with a capital L) or what happens when some previously living organism is now dead. What happens to the “Life force” that enervated or activated that organism and which is now (apparently) absent? No one has the least idea.

 

Many, many years ago, when I and the world was much younger, I came across a poem that intrigued me without my fully understanding what it meant. Now, after both my marriages ended with the death of my wife and the death of my sibling, parents and many friends I think I, more or less, understand it now (maybe I’m just a slow learner!).

 

In neither situation, regarding my marriages, was I able to do anything. Obviously, one cannot “fight” death!

 

But I’m still intrigued by this poem!

 

The Shadow.

 

The Shadow leaned over me, whispering, in the darkness,

            Thoughts without sound; 

Sorrowful thoughts that filled me with helpless wonder

            And held me bound.

 

Sadder than memory, sharp as remorse, in the quiet

            Before I slept,

The whisper I heard of the one implacable Shadow,

            And my heart wept.

 

“Day by day, in your eyes, the light grows dimmer,

            With the joy you have sung.

You knew it would go; but, ah, when you knew it and 

      sang it,

            Your heart was young;

 

“And a year to you, then, was an age; but now” said

      The Shadow,

            Malignant and cold,

“The light and the colour are fading, the ecstasy dying,

            It is time to grow old.”

 

Oh, I could have borne the worst that he had to tell me,

            Lost youth, age, death;

But he turned to breathe on the quiet heart sleeping 

     beside me

            The same cold breath.

 

And there by the throat I grappled him. “Let me bear

     all of it.

            Let her dream on.”

Soundlessly, shadow with shadow, we wrestled together,

            Till the grey dawn.

 

                                                            Alfred Noyes.

One thing leads to another

I know that I have written about this before but to me it is of never ending interest.

 

What started it all? Every effect has a cause. But what? And why? That we can never know – which is why I’m attracted to the Ancient Greek idea of the Fates. Those mysterious "forces" which the Greeks portrayed as three women. Each of the three Fates had a different task, revealed by her name: Clotho spun the thread of life, Lachesis measured its allotted length, and Atropos cut the thread with her shears. 

 

Just to go back a few steps – I studied a Bachelor of Commerce degree at university. I didn’t really know what I wanted to do. I had been working in the bush as a surveyor’s assistant when a bloke I met suggested that I could better myself by going to university (he must have seen my potential!). So I did.

 

Science and mathematics were not my strong points so I thought Commerce would give me some scope. My employment history at the beginning was more in the managerial area.

 

I met my first wife, Frances Hunt (born in England), an attractive brunette, on a blind date and we hit it off straight away and were married within 3 or 4 months (not sure exactly, now after nearly 50 years). Seven years later I was working at the (then) Rhodesia Herald newspaper, as an Assistant Manager when our African maid phoned to say that, "something is wrong with the Madam. Please come quickly."

 

That I did, and found her unconscious on the bathroom floor – she had started the process that ended in her death four days later. Leaving me a widower with a 4 year old son.

 

Then about a year later, after I had quit the newspaper and started auditing with a well-known accounting firm, I was helping to audit a large department store in (then) Salisbury in (then) Rhodesia when I saw another, attractive but very small brunette. Anyway after nearly two years of persistence on my part Maria Augusta  (Magucha) Bandeira de Lima agreed to marry me. Now Magucha had some quite grave health issues – glomerulonephritis – a serious kidney disease. She was advised that pregnancy was not a good idea because of the strain it would place on her kidneys and the fetus. She persisted and in the hospital just before she was to give birth I was given a form to sign – given the state of her health, in a life or death situation, did I want the mother to survive or the new baby!! That was the hardest decision I’ve ever made.

 

Very fortunately both survived!

 

Then, after a series of both political and personal events we decided to emigrate to Australia.

 

But then going even further back. My parents left South Africa for Rhodesia, in 1950, because they did not like the way the Apartheid regime introduced by the Nationalist government in 1948, was being implemented. 

 

Also Magucha’s parents were more or less driven out of the then Portuguese colony of Angola because of the 1975 revolution in Portugal and the granting of independence to the colonies. So, after a number of incidents, they ended up in Rhodesia in 1976. 

 

There is a confluence of events developing here. 

 

Even further back in time my maternal grandfather Henry Matson, born in New Zealand, as a young man ended up in Demerara, previously a Dutch colony in what is now Guiana. There he learned about the cultivation of sugar cane and the extraction of sugar. Then through a series of events he ended up in Natal (now KwaZulu-Natal) in South Africa on a sugar plantation owned by the Acutt family. There he met and married Grace Acutt. My mother, Marjorie Matson was the second of three children.

 

My paternal grandfather (Dugald Campbell Watt) was a Scottish medical doctor who emigrated to South Africa to join his brothers. He became a very well known doctor in Natal. He met and married a girl 19 years younger than he was (he was 38 and she was 19) – Johanna (Annie) Anderson. My father was the younger of two boys born to them.

 

Then naturally, of course, my father, a journalist, met my mother, also a journalist and they married. This is where the "plot thickens". My mother was very ill after the birth of my older brother and very nearly died of septicemia – almost a death sentence in 1936. Dr Campbell Watt’s intervention saved her life. Otherwise I wouldn't be here writing this!!  

 

Then in the natural course of life, Magucha died nearly five years ago from complication brought about by the combination of the significant side effects of the many immunosuppressant drugs she had to take after her kidney transplant. These were too much for her little body to bear.  

 

I know that similar stories abound – everyone has their story. 

 

The Fates played their part (in my case) to perfection. Apparently. 

 

So you see one thing led to another – certainly completely out of my control.

 

The Catholic Church and its Moral Authority.

I ask the question – a valid question – where is God? Is God “up there”, here, everywhere? If, as I suspect, God is everywhere why is it then claimed that a priest is a required “intermediary” through which a believer can “talk” to God.

If God is everywhere is a priest really necessary?

This brings me to comment on the truly appalling, even horrifying revelations in the 2017 Report by the Australian Royal Commission into Institutional Responses to Child Sexual Abuse.

The Catholic Church, while certainly not the only one, has the worst record of any institution mentioned. The Catholic Church, through its Archbishops in Australia, has stated, in answer to recommendations in the Royal Commission Report, that any change to the requirement for priests to be celibate, and changes to the confessional will not be considered.

My questions then are:-

Why is “celibacy” so important to the Catholic hierarchy?

Also, why is the Confessional so “sacrosanct”?

And why is it that “Canon Law” cannot be challenged or altered?

Celibacy:

The Church, as I understand it, considers clerical celibacy to be not a doctrine, but a discipline. 

There has never been any doubt, however, that it is an ecclesiastical discipline, as Pope John Paul II said at a public audience on 17 July 1993, that celibacy "does not belong to the essence of priesthood.” He went on to speak, nevertheless, of its aptness for the requirements of sacred orders, asserting that the discipline "enters into the logic of (priestly) consecration."

Because the rule of celibacy is an ecclesiastical discipline and not a doctrine, it can, in principle be changed at any time by the Pope. Nonetheless, the current Pope, Pope Francis, and his predecessors have spoken clearly of their understanding that the traditional practice was not likely to change.

Throughout the early centuries of Christianity, let it be known, clergy continued to get married, though marriage was not required. It was not until the turn of the first millennium that the church started to canonically regulate clerical marriage, mainly in response to clerical abuses and corruption. It was of particular concern that at the death of a clergyman, his wife and children would inherit church property. The Council of Pavia (1018), for example, issued regulations on how to deal with children of clergy, declaring them serfs of the church, unable to be ordained and barring them from inheriting their father's “benefices” (income connected to a church office or parish).

So, it can be seen that celibacy has nothing to do with God (at least no more so that any other human activity) but a lot more to do with mercenary and ecclesiastical considerations – the wealth and authority of the Catholic Church.

Confessional:

Again, as I understand it, this requirement was originally imposed in the Middle Ages, at least in part, by church leaders who expected priests to interrogate penitents and learn if they might be heretics.

Confession and the authority to grant absolution also greatly enhanced the power of the priest. With sins absolved, the believer would gain heaven. Without absolution, death could bring the spiritual pain of purgatory or the eternal damnation of hell.

It would appear that from the very beginnings of the confessional, practices varied widely among both priests and laypeople. Some clergy emphasized compassion and forgiveness and faithfully kept secret what they heard. Others exploited their power and the information captured during the sacrament. The 11th-century monk Peter Damian (1007 – 1072) famously excoriated clerics for the sexual abuse of minors, which often began with the penitent-confessor relationship. In the later Middle Ages, apparently criminality among confessors was widespread and entrenched. Much of the criminality involved sexual assaults and priestly transgressions against the church's sexual mores (adopted as a rule or canon).

So, again, there is nothing “sacred” about the confessional – quite the reverse. At best a priest should be acting only as a counselor for a troubled parishioner.

Canon Law:

I offer the following (adapted from Wikipedia):- “The canon law of the Catholic Church is the system of laws and legal principles made and enforced by the hierarchical authorities of the Church to regulate its external organization and government and to order and direct the activities of Catholics toward the mission of the Church.

What began with rules ("canons") adopted by the Apostles at the Council of Jerusalem (held about 50 AD) has developed into a highly complex legal system incorporating not just elements of the New Testament, but some of the Hebrew (Old Testament) Roman, Visigothic, Saxon and Celtic legal traditions.

It is the internal ecclesiastical law, or operational policy, governing the Catholic Church and other churches. Canon law wasn't just a body of rules and regulations governing members of the church, but rather an elaborate code of ethics shaping family life and marriage. Due to this, it was able to manipulate the fundamental operations of family life within the areas that it oversaw. The Catholic Church (and other churches), have manipulated the basis and validity of marriage, the ability to end a marriage as well as remarriage abilities, and the norms for sexual behaviour. The way that such church laws are legislated, interpreted and at times adjudicated varies widely. In all these traditions, a canon was originally a rule adopted by a church council; these canons formed the foundation of canon law.”

So you see, again, there is nothing really “God like” or sacred in these canons (laws) – at least no more so that in the Common Law of Australia. A canon law cannot, ever, take precedence over the Laws of Australia. Otherwise should we now allow “laws” that apply to Scientology, to Islam, the Hindu or any other faith to also take precedence?

The Catholic Church has no claim to any “moral authority” while it hides behind these so called inviolable “laws of the Church”. They are nothing of the sort.

So I ask again, where is God? Is God “up there”, here, or everywhere?  

Currents in Life

I have been finding it difficult to write anything for some time – I have no “mojo”. But then life throws things at one which are unexpected and for which one may be totally unprepared.

It is almost as if there is an under-current which no one can see but which sweeps one hither and thither as it sees fit, I suppose. Take for instance my wife, Maria, or Magucha as she was universally known; above all she was my best friend for nearly thirty seven years. That is a big chunk of anyone’s life. Now that she is no longer here, alive and vibrant (as she was) I have to try to live – not my life with her anymore – but to live my life in a totally different manner.

This is very difficult to explain. While Magucha’s death was not a complete and absolute surprise the speed and the manner was. She had been very ill before and had not been 100% well for quite some years. Now it is almost as if she is still with me. For instance when I shop for food I seem always to look first for what I know she used to like. Sometimes I catch myself turning to ask her if she would like this or that!

To me our marriage was in truth a partnership. We were in it together, different roles, but each was half of a whole. We had our differences, of course we did, but we were still very strong together and I never thought of her as anything other than an equal partner in our marriage. She was always independent and never liked to be tied to any particular course of action – she was in every respect a free soul.

I forget the exact words but there is a saying that goes something like this:-

“If you love something let it fly free; if it returns its yours; if it doesn’t, it never was”.

This is what I tried to do with our life together and by and large I think I succeeded.

I’ll end this post with something that the American rebel and “Gonzo” journalist, Hunter S Thompson, wrote that I think applied to and gives a good insight into Magucha’s whole approach to life.

“ Life should not be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside in a cloud of smoke, thoroughly used up, totally worn out, and loudly proclaiming, “Wow! What a Ride!”