Saturday, December 27, 2008

Examining your life

First up, a happy festive season and prosperous New Year in 2009, to all.

It was Socrates who claimed that “....the unexamined life is not worth living” (Dialogues of Plato – Apology). While I am still not very good at this – examining my life I mean, being somewhat nervous about what I might discover, there are some real advantages in doing so.

Writing about what I want to say comes easier to me than talking about it. One of the spin-offs from writing these blogs is that I am really learning a great deal about myself. Things that I like, what I don’t like, what I am quite good at, what I should not write about – a whole range of things. And that is good. Life is always a process, a journey from birth to death. I say a journey but really there is no need to travel at all – it is an “inner” journey, a journey of self discovery. There is no need for me to move one centimetre from where I am now to start, progress and finish my ‘journey’.

We are all a great deal more than the water tight skin bag, filled with flesh blood and bones, that we call our body. It is made of all the common elements of the universe but, as I say, there is more to each of us than that. This skin bag contains what we are made of, but who we are, our emotions, our thoughts, our hopes and aspirations, is another matter. One moment our body is alive, the next it may be dead. The life “essence” that enlivened it has now abandoned the body and what is left is a pile of inanimate elements that will dissipate back into nature. The heat of the body, the water, and the earth elements all return back to be, in due course, recycled.

So, apart from our body, what about the rest of what makes us human? What do we do? What are our thoughts and in our private moments what are our true hopes and aspirations? What is the guiding principle behind our emotions? Some of these are unknowable, in that each person has to experience whatever is needed for themselves and this cannot be replicated in any formal sense.

What started me of on this ‘inner quest’, if that is what it can be called, was many years ago at Rhodes University, in Grahamstown, South Africa. I had been working for four years before I enrolled, so I was, I suppose a mature student. Anyway, the first year exams came around and I was very nervous. To calm my nerves I did what I still do now – I sat at my desk turned off the lights in my room, closed my eyes, quietened my mind and was still. All of a sudden the hairs at the back of my neck rose up, my breath and pulse quickened and a scene appeared ‘behind my eyes’. The scene was of a beautiful orange and red sunset over a lake, or a body of water – very peaceful. It then suddenly changed to a beautiful cold early dawn scene at some marsh – I could see the reeds and other water plants growing in clumps in the water. The sky was a clear eggshell blue and across my vision there appeared a flight of geese, flying in a V formation, from left to right. Everything was at peace. The beauty of the scenes is really indescribable.

Immediately my breathing and pulse returned to normal and I ‘awoke’ with an unshakeable belief, a knowledge, that ‘all will be well’. The scenes and emotions from that evening, so long ago, are with me still. I just have to close my eyes and I am back there in my little cubicle of a room reliving those same emotions. All was well. I passed all my exams and got my degree. And all is still ‘well’ in my life – what I felt then I still feel now.

How I ‘received’ that knowledge, that belief, and where it came from I don’t know. I have my ideas about this of course, but I cannot prove a thing. But it gives me comfort and brings peace of mind and this will remain with me till the end of my days.

Many others have ‘witnessed’ similar scenes or even had near death experiences. I know that my late mother did with the very difficult birth of my brother. My wife also had a near death experience when she suffered her first kidney failure. It cannot be that uncommon as even in my small circle I know of three instances, myself, my wife and my mother.

All this gives another dimension to ‘Life’ and I think, enriches it. As I say it has certainly brought me comfort and peace of mind. That is why I am still searching, to see what more there is to learn, if that is the correct word. I sometimes think that this knowledge is innate, within us all and all we have to do is to ‘discover’ it. That is why I love Philosophy and why I like writing. It gives me the opportunity to share what I have learned and what I believe is of vital importance, with others.

2 comments:

Brock Atkinson said...

Did you see phosphenes, or did you imagine that sunset?

Do you do this in times of stress or angst, or most of the time?

Andrewlifecoach said...

Hi Brock, I am not quite sure I understand what you mean in your first comment. Yes I meditate quite often (not every day as I should) and while I am not sure where what I "see" comes from I have my ideas. I do not do it just in times of angst or stress - just when I feel like it. This is a very individual thing, nothing I can say will give you any idea of what it is like. It cannot be replicated - it is a very personal thing. It gives me comfort and certainly enriches my life.